Courtney's Island
by Paka-Simon-Trevor-Forever
Summary: This is Total Drama Island from Courtney's point of view. Don't worry, plenty of DxC fluff later on. Hopefully not to OOC. Please R&R!
1. Not so happy campers, part one

**Courtney's island**

My first sighting of camp Wawanakwa was an extremely fat boy yodeling. _Doesn't he know that a good physique can improve all or most aspects of the working life? If everyone is a simple/naïve as he, I'll win this thing in a heartbeat._

But I put on my respectful smile anyway. "And here's… Courtney!" Chris said as he helped me off the boat.

"Thank you." I smiled. I really had little to no respect for television hosts, but I had to put on a good front. I daintily walked towards the other campers.

There were 18 (?) of them, all piled together in a mismatched throng. In the front was the fat boy, who looked nice enough, a blonde girl with a surfboard, a short kid with a gap tooth, and a really really really tall muscular Jamaican guy.

"Hi! You must be the other contestants. It's very nice to meet you all!" that's what I called 'putting on my dignity'.

"How's it going! I'm Owen!" yelled the big blonde guy.

"Nice to meet you- oh… wooooow…" I had just set eyes on Justin. I'm not going to lie. He was HOT, my friends, HOT.

"This is Justin," explained Chris. "Welcome to Total Drama Island, man."

"Thanks Chris, this is great!"

"Just so you know, we picked you based entirely on your looks." _Knew it._

"I can live with that." _He can? I wouldn't be able to…_

Owen looked really starry-eyed and was talking to Justin about pants. _I don't want to know._ But I was still sizing up the competition.

**To stay away from**:

Faux-hawk Gothic (Glen? Greta?)

Queen Bee

**To befriend**:

Surfer chick Elvis

Vestie (Bettie?) Cherries (Lequisha..?)

Crocodile Dundee Bookie (Nolan?)

Big guy McHottie

Owen

**Ignore**:

Ditz Harold

Lame-o Wannabe

Wonder twins (Casey and Daley?)

Hat boy

And some other people without mental nicknames.

It might seem cruel, but it rough-drafts your whole game plan. All that I needed to know then was who would be on my team.

Some hyper girl falling off the coat snapped me out of my reverie. No one was helping her so I decided to.

"Guys! She could be _seriously hurt!_"

"That felt… so… good!" _say what?_ "Except for hitting my chin. Is this a summer camp? That is so cool. Do you have paper Mache here? Are we having lunch soon?!"

"That- is a good call!" okay, at that point Owen almost went into the 'avoid' pile. _But he's just like… a big teddy bear or something._

Then it was time for the promo pics. Stupid Chris.

….,,;;::!!!! Wawanakwa!!!!::;;,,….

"This- is camp Wawanakwa. Your home. For the next eight weeks." _or three days, _I thought nervously. "The campers sitting around you will be your cabin mates, your competition, maybe even your friends!" _pbth. I don't need friends. Well, Bridgette and I are kind of hitting it off._ "Ya dig?"

_Ya dig? How lame is that!_

Then he babbled for a few more minutes until faux-hawk (I learned his name was Duncan) interrupted. "Excuse me. What will the sleeping arrangements be? Because I'd like to request a bunk _under her._" He smirked, pointing a thumb over his shoulder at Heather. _How juvenile. The PIG. Heather's ugly anyway._

"They're not coed, are they?" She asked Chris, a little nervously.

Chris told us that girls get one side of the cabin, while boys get the other. Which sounded pretty coed to me. Then Sadie and Katie started babbling about how they have to be near each other or something.

"This cannot be happening," Mumbled Gwen. I had to agree with her; this place kind of… sucked.

"If I call your name, go stand over there. Gwen, Trent, Heather, Cody, Lindsay, Beth, Katie, Owen, Leshawna, Justin and Noah: you will be officially known as… the Screaming Gophers!"

I almost burst out laughing, but that would be cruel.

"The rest of you, over here." He rattled off a list of names, mine included. "You will be- the Killer Bass!" I mentally gagged and saw Bridge miming hanging herself. I giggled softly.

"But Katie's a gopher! I _have_ to be a gopher!" Sadie was wailing.

She looked so pathetic, standing there all alone, that I decided to help her out.

"Sadie, is it? Come on… it'll be okay." I said, leading away a sobbing Sadie.

"This is so unfair! I miss you Katie!

"I miss you to!"

….,,;;::!!!! Wawanakwa!!!!::;;,,….

Chris showed us our cabins, the Bass being the western one. I walked into the room on the left, which had a carving saying 'girls' on the door.

"Ummmm, bunk beds?????" I half screeched, half whimpered as I looked on. Bridge sauntered in.

"I call top bunk."

I sighed and stowed away my grey suitcase under my bunk. Sadie and Katie were outside crying, and then Izzy bounded in.

"Hi!I'mIzzy!Somethingreallyweirdhappenedtomeonthewaytotheferrytohere-"

Just then we were saved by this really obnoxious shriek renting the air.

"AH! What is it! Kill it! Kill it!" the sound came from the Gopher cabin and we ran over to take a look. The Bass boys were already there, and for some reason Duncan was raising an axe.

THWACK!

"Awesome…"

"Well, that's one way to kill a cockroach…"

_Eeeeeeew I hate bugs! Especially cockroaches! I hope that's the only one…_

….,,;;::!!!! Wawanakwa!!!!::;;,,….

"Listen up! I serve it three times a day. And you will eat it! Three times! A day!" this really big drill sergeant guy was belting at us. _I think I got some spit on my face._ "grab your tray, getcha food and – SIT YOUR BUTTS DOWN, now!"

then the short girl in the vest, Beth, started saying something about food groups.

"are we sure this stuff is edible?" I whisper to Bridgette. I am dead serious, but Bridgette grins and Geoff laughs.

"I think mine just moved!" he joked. We all laughed at this. Well, not me. I was to busy trying not to barf.

….,,;;::!!!! Wawanakwa!!!!::;;,,….

"welcome to the main lodge!" Chris was saying in his customary annoyingly perky fashion.

"yo… my man… can we order a pizza?" Geoff stutters, looking a little green around the gills. Kafling. "No! whoa! It's cool, G! Brown slop is cool! Right, guys?" we all nervously agree.

"your next challenge- is in the next hour!" Chris continues, as though there was no interruption.

"what do you think they'll make us do?" Sadie asks nervously.

"Hey. It's our first challenge. How hard could it be?" DJ replied, contentedly.

It's amazing how wrong one person can be.


	2. Not so happy campers, part two

**Courtney's island**

Chris. Evil, malicious Chris Maclean. He WOKE US UP at _5:00 _and told us, _and I quote,_ "Start hiking!" _excuse me?!!!!!!_

What were we trekking, you may ask? Why, an incredibly 89.9 degree slope of course! _I swear I could kill right now._ And to make it worse: everyone was singing those stupid camp songs! You know, little red wagon, rickabamboo, B-I-N-G-O, and the 'letter home' song. I guess they thought it would lighten the mood. _PSH._

I sort of sulked along near the back, trying to show my not-so-happy mood to Chris without being disrespectful. Like he'd care anyway. After a while the ever-bundle-of-joy Bridgette noticed and dragged me into another song:

"_Nobody loves me,_

_Everybody hates me,_

_I guess I'll go eat worms!_

_Nice fat juicy one-"_

I cut her off. "That is SOO gross."

"Eh, kind of. But it's for fun, Court! Come on!"

I grumbled but joined in the chorus of 'we will rock you'. Duncan and Gwen seemed to know the words best.

…**.,,;;!!!!Wawanakwa!!!!;;,,….**

Holy crap. Sharks… cliff… imbecilely teeny ring… GOD. I almost fainted.

"So… who's up first?" Bridge stammered nervously. Hey, but I didn't feel sorry for her. She WAS the one who told Chris it was a piece of cake.

Cricket cricket. Owen breaks the silence, "Oh come on guys! I hear these shows always make the interns do it first, to make sure it's survivable!"

_Yeah. And they're probably all dead._

"So who's up?" Bridgette pressed, obviously praying it wouldn't have to be her.

"Ladies first," Duncan purred.

_Oh goodness. He couldn't be flirting with me… could he?_

"Fine. I'll go," Bridgette replied bracingly. "It's no biggie… just an insane cliff dive into a circle of angry sharks." And she executed a perfect swan dive into the water… hundreds. Of. Feet… below… her…

And I almost died on the spot.

…**.,,;;!!!!Wawanakwa!!!!;;,,….**

One by one the other bass jumped. The only chicken so far was DJ, which is when we learned about the dreaded 'chicken hat'.

I couldn't do it. "excuse me, Chris? I have a medical condition?"

"what condition."

"A condition that _prevents _me from jumping off cliffs?" _also known as sanity?_

He smirked. "You could chicken out if you _want,_ but it might cost your team the win. And then they'll hate you." _Like anyone could hate a CIT._

It was a calculated risk, of course. "It's a calculated risk. I've seen the other team, and I don't think nine of them will jump."

"Okay… here's your chicken hat." And he shoved me over to the escalator-of-shame without another wasted word. _No one could hate a CIT,_ I reminded myself. _Right?_

…**.,,;;!!!!Wawanakwa!!!!;;,,….**

#$%^&*#$%^&*%^#%#! Our hot tub was absolutely terrible! I mean, it was crooked, and ductaped together, and… I had to prevent myself from either sobbing or ripping someone's head off.

The gophers won, of course. _Stupid, no-good, evil-_ okay I should probably stop there. Not PG, people: and I pride myself on my language.

…**.,,;;!!!!Wawanakwa!!!!;;,,….**

"um, what do we do now?" Katie asked. Apparently she was on our team. Wait… no… _Sadie_ was the one originally on the other team…

"We have to choose who we're going to vote off," I replied decisively, illuminating my fine leadership skills that _made me essential to the team._

"Well I think it should be princess," Duncan-the-oaf said, pointing his thumb over his shoulder to me, "Or the brick house here," he continued, indicating DJ.

"WHAT? Why?!"

"because, unless I'm mistaken, you two are the only ones wearing chicken hats. And if we ever have to lift a truck, I like our odds with the big guy."

"b-but you guys need me! I'm the only one-"

"WE KNOW." Bridgette, my supposed _friend_, cut me off. Apparently she had joined the dark side. "who used to be a real CIT. So who would you pick?"

I glanced around, still a little put out. _AHA! _"what about: HIM!" I exclaimed, pointing at a surprised Tyler.  
"NO!" shouted Lindsay, followed by her muttering something about salt.

"heyheyhey, at least he jumped off the cliff, chicken wing!"

"SHUT IT!"

suddenly Geoff appeared out of nowhere. "Okay, let's just chill out. This is getting _way_ to heavy!"

Duncan glared. "I've had enough prison food for one day… I'm gonna go take a nap."

_He can't do that!_ "You can't do that! We haven't decided who's going yet!" But he had already left.

"I just don't see why we lost, ay? I mean, they're the ones with more girls!"

_H oh boy, he's going to die._

…**.,,;;!!!!Wawanakwa!!!!;;,,….**

_Are you recording this? Good. Well they can enjoy their little party- all they want! But I'm going to win this competition. And NOTHING is gonna stop me!_

_**Forever's babbly a/n:**_

**You like? You hate? You attack with DubbleV's metal bat? Yeah, well I have a bazooka- with flying monkeys! SO THERE! Ahem… moment of temporary insanity. **

**I'm sorry it took so long to update… heheh… I forgot I had this chappie hidden in my notebook until I checked out someone's profile and saw they had favorited it (WOOOOOT). So thanks for checking in!**

**-Forevs**


End file.
